Emergency Shopping Expotition!

Once at sea, we meant to celebrate with wine or beer but instead celebrated with instant noodles. This was my fault: when I sent him to the canteen with our remaining funds, I’d told George to get wine or beer.

During this trip to Conch, sharing a cabin with her, I’ve been given even more reasons to love Sybil. Among others, I learned she doesn’t snore. When we get to Conch, we may get married and I may become king of Conch—we’ll have to see.

My first order of business is to ensure that Dickhead is restored to health. Flarq made a salve out of plants he found that'll protect the whale’s wounds from infection. Before he left, Moses also made medicine from some plants he found. After taking it, Dickhead seemed in much better spirits. He’s in a specially rigged-up harness now, being towed by our ship. As it happens, the whale hospital on Conch is the best in the world. My luck finally seems to have turned.

Dear God, I hope dear Gus has not jinxed the denouement!

In case he has not, the Mother of All Parties must be planned and shopped for, and that means an Expotition to various chandleries, such as Debauchery Depot, Booze-Ups 'R Us, and Roast Beast To Go.

Fortunately, at the moment there is still plenty of room to accomodate guests. For some odd reason, my long-expected new arrivals did not turn up last night. I am advised by the earlier guests that the next two might appear to be rather scary at first glance, but turn out to be of the teddy-bear/pussy-cat persuasion. However, there is some glitch in their travel plans, and now it seems that they will not arrive for at least two weeks! Whatever am I to do to entertain these people? Well, I shall send them off to view some interesting archeological sites; we have plenty of those in the area. Apparently there were some actual Amazonian women warriors attached to the Roman army; they tell me that the female half of the no-shows would probably have qualified for "warrior princess." And that the male half would qualify for "surprisingly good-looking once all pretense of ridiculous gym-rat clothing is removed, showing only extremely well defined back and ab muscles."

I shall have to see about that. I expect Sir (courtesy gendered) snuggs will now volunteer to oil him up.

Speaking of oiling up, I do hope Flarq is still interested in the "stand impressively by the door and bar idiots from entry" position.