I could not apologize more profusely than if I fell to the floor and commenced to perform the Wiggly Worm dance. As in:
I sir, am a wiggly worm, sir. A wiggly worm, sir, is the most utterly utterly lowest form of life, sir.
The dance is performed by wriggling about on the floor in an abased and ingratiating manner, with much helpless flailing about and waving of limbs in the air.
I have been remiss. So now I must again be reMrs., and offer such opinions as may occur to me from time to time on matters piratical (meaning Gus, the book wot he wrote, and now Nelson's blarg) and parenthetical (meaning absolutely everything else).
And now I really must ask dear Q. Sybill if she may give us a date for the bridal shower. I do hope she doesn't mind if a Jackoozie is substituted for the usual waterworks.
5 comments:
oh miz b! i'm so glad you're back!!! *teeters over on awfully tired manola blahniked-feet and falls into your arms*
the mcfinster brothers have been awfully helpful....really, too TOO helpful, and i need a weekend in the *portsmouth facility for the mentally conflucked*. a looooooooong weekend.
i trust you'll find the books are in order, and when you have a few moments, i will endeavor to explain that $758 expenditure for pool chemicals. you may wish to take a gander at the back garden-come-olympic swimmin' pool of which you are now the proud owner. *grumbles* there's precious lil room to incantate in now. i tried to implement a rather vigorous lil chant last week, and fell off the high dive. on the other hand, if we cover it, will make a lovely dance floor for miz sibyll's impendin' bridal hen party.
*hugs your ankles repeatedly* have i mentioned how glad i am that you're back???
My dear, my very dear snuggs: it had not occurred to me until this very moment that lithe young men in Speedos are a logical development after the installation of a 'Lympic swimmning pool.
Your brilliance rivals the stars. We shall lounge and demand pedicures and Mai Tais from dear Chad as we languidly hold up scorecards as each swimmer goes past (even if they are walking and not actually swimming).
Bliss.
i take it that means you're approvin' the $700 plus expenditure on pool chemicals. i understand it's a 6 month supply. phew! i am so relieved.
i might consider a weekend of languid loungin' poolside while impersonatin' an olympic judge. they don't hand out swag bags at the *portsmouth home for the terminally confuzzled*.
Guid day an weel met, guidman Boab. Ye may bide a wee for 12 pound and found a week.
Mind the wee sleekit beastie ye mought find in nether hedgerow... as it may turn out to be a particular friend of ours named Bob, who has had many amazing adventures and has his master's papers owing to a solo voyage on a breadfruit crate.
And now what is your tipple? A bumper, or two? It seems a good time for a song as well.
oh welcome, welcome Boab! i knew miz b. would find her way to hirin' you. *beams* perhaps you could keep an eye out for the mcfinster brothers; it sure would be a load off of my mind (and my manola blahnick's). last time we turned our back on them, we ended up with an olympic swimmin' pool. good guys, just erm....a lil frisky with way too much time on their hands.
*passes you a filled frosty mug* we haven't had a sing-along like that since the tunettes were last in town. they did a lovely rendition of *it's rainin' men* with the untimely assistance of the mcfinster brothers on fire sprinklers. *brightens* of course, after we got that lil mess cleaned up, we didn't have to mop the pub floor for a week.
welcome tho', mr. boab. tonite's drinks are on me.
snuggs
Post a Comment