As the link in the title suggests: we may be selling rather a lot of those new Very Expensive Drinks soon.
Also, 10 pairs of pirate pants mysteriously came on the market. As dear perseverant Gus fought only 8 pirates, I'm worried about the count.
I'll deal with a little guck, byoockum and scrud problem we have in the scullery if the rest of you can fan around the place making order out of chaos. So long as we can present a charmingly disshevelle' face to the world, rather than outright squalor, it should be sufficient (though the ladies' parlor does need to be neat as a new pin for the less boisterous of our clientele).
Pity we couldn't score some shark so that we could throw a bar-b-cue. However, I do wish dear Gus weren't quite so hard on boats (there's a joke in there somewhere, I expect someone will find it eventually).
7 comments:
dear miz b:
it's awful late...in the words of my inner domestic goddess, i say, 'screw the housework, come loll about in the hottub with us.' i've posted an assignment sheet just over the bloody mary mix, so the girls will see it when they wake up. *hugs you* c'mon lady, it's been a day.
snuggs
*note to self* order a case of visine.
Does your establishment permits shouldered parrots?
Thirsty
That's quite all right. We had a shouldered lobster in here a few weeks back. Rather a perky little chap, or at least he was until the Friday night Seafood Bash. I understand he survived, but is deathly afraid of small wooden mallets.
You are more than welcome to hit up the tourists... er,
ask for remuneration if transient non-drinking looky-lou types request to to have their picture taken with you and your vociferous pet. All I ask is a very small percentage of the take and that your parrot be trained to occasionally say "Polly want a grog! Bottoms up!"
miz b: something i noticed in the garden earlier this evening (thanks niki!) made me think real hard about that barber chair in the shed. ahem. if we were to clean it up real good, wouldn't it be the *pefect* way to serve upside down margaritas? also, instituted a new drink, in honor of last week's *employee of the week* and the meritorious service duq provided that entitled him to that recognition. it's called *fire in the hole* and is equal parts jagermeister & goldschlager, chilled & served up. was very popular among the ladies of the embroidery circle. (at least, until the hangover sets in.)
niki: totally forgot to save you last nite's champagne bottles. not to worry tho'. felt a lil pamperin' was in order after mixing up 157 boxes of lime jello, so i bathed in a case. now *that's* a bubble bath. dead soldiers in box next to walk-in cooler. (miz b: i.o.u. a case of champagne.)
jello, livvy, elf & ariel send ^(")'s to the chef for the baked scrod avec buerre citron. (remember, if they bring you a dead mouse, no matter how disgustin'....please praise them. they think they are contributin' to the larder.) noelle pretends to prefer her dinner on the paw, so to speak, but i noticed she nudged jello out of the way. monet, the calico manx (aka, miss lamb/miss look-at-my-butt) romanced the lesbian couple at the bar and got most of their shrimp cocktail. no scrod for her!
please tell me someone got pictures of miz b receivin' her embroidery hoop and pepper spray; i'd hate to think that the moment was lost to posterity.
snuggs
Well done, ladies. That was an extremely enjoyable evening's entertainment last night.
On the strength of your very hard work (and the sale of rather a lot of Very Expensive Drinks and chances at jello wrestling) I am installing a Very Large, Very Flat Television in the saloon bar. Please schedule viewing-and-carousing events as you see fit for our clientele and demographic (persons of uncertain gender and age who drink very, very heavily and say "Arrr!"). However, I do reserve the right on certain Tuesdays to drink even more heavily, hoot derisively at the action on the screen, and make excessive use of the instant replay and slo-mo features it comes with.
Menu notes: steak with a bit of pirate in would be said to be "garrrrn" -ished. Steak with rather a lot of pirate in should be held until the coroner can get here.
I am very pleased with our stock in trade (buxom barmaids and fine tipples). That's an excellent idea to serve gingerale - might I suggest Fentiman's? This isn't your grandmama's ginger ale; it'll take the top of your head off and come back later and bite you in the arse (I ask your pardons). Delicious stuff, if drunk with a modicum of care. If dear Fentiman's isn't available, a good quality domestic will have to do.
Also... isn't gingerale an ingredient in tequila slammers? Or is that another explosively carbonated potation? I do think we should start serving slammers post-haste.
I'm just recalling the amount of money I made off of a bunch of fisherman one night. They were just off the halibut boat and their pockets were absolutely stuffed with cash. They consumed between them (and a lot of very pretty hangers-on) about 25 slammers. Mysteriously, the pretty hangers-on evaporated as soon as the cash did. Net result: rather a lot of extra lolly in the till that night, and a couple of rather smelly sleepovers on the barroom floor in the morning. I shall purchase the appropriate boards and shot glasses on my morning rounds.
Finally - if a young couple wander into this establishment and commence to bickering and fighting, you have my permission to show them the door with extreme prejudice.
dear miz b:
please add an *alabama slammer* to the slam board....southern comfort, amoretto, sprite, tonic & a squeeze of lemon. yum yum yum.
methinks there is an interestin' story behind the couple we're supposed to show the door to, with extreme prejudice. rogue grog warriors? can we embroider????
snuggs
snuggs, me light-'o-life, my incoherent reference to the bickering young couple is best explained by today's linkage.
Mmm, that 'Bama Slamma sounds delish. Yes, please.
And now a spot of lunch and rather a lot of ice cream.
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